Sadness

If I had to choose one word which I feel describes my state of being today it would be sadness, possibly weary or exhausted might work as well. I have been through a lot in life, especially as a child, that no one should ever have to go through. I have made peace with my past forgiven those who have hurt me, even when no apology was extended. Knowing the forgiveness was for my sake and not theirs. I made a pact with myself that I would not continue the cycle, that I would learn from my experience and use it to help others.  Unfortunately I feel powerless to do just that, help others. I try to share my experiences and to help people see the way for themselves, I know I hate being told flat out how I should or shouldn't do something.  I know everyone must learn from their own mistakes, but it is so hard sitting back watching the train wreck wondering if I had tried harder if I could have stopped it...